Hello. My name is Eva and I'm a big mess.

I'm 30, overweight and under-successful. I'm messy, disorganised and vague. I'm a mother, a wife a homeowner, a performer and I still don't know who I am or what the hell I'm supposed to be doing.

Every year I say to myself, this year will be different, this year I will change, but we all know how that story ends; boredom, followed by failure, followed by crying on the kitchen floor whilst eating cooking chocolate because it's the only sweet thing left in the house.

So, I've decided I need to take a radically different approach. I've decided that the oath to change needs to be made publicly... well sort of. I know I shall drown in a sea of well-meaning and ambitious blogers but it's out there and that means something. It means that if I fail, I'll do it in front of lots of people and I'm a performer so failing in front everyone is sort of my raison d'etre.

My year starts today. October 30th, 2009. Halloween. We don't really take much notice of this tradition in Australia but there seems to be a sense of comic irony about making a positive, Oprah-style conviction to find meaning and value in one's life when everyone else is spending the day worshiping the dark side. So in my own little quirky way the journey to change begins and we'll see how far i got on October 30th, 2010.

These blogs are going to be short. One reason for this is because, like the rest of my generation I have a very short attention span. The other reason is that I currently have a two year old jumping on me.

More soon.